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credits

layout: detonatedlove♥
pictures: ohhspontaneityy
stocks: _excentric_

ma just called me earlier today telling me that my dad is in ttsh. her voice sounded heavy. and i had a bad feeling. turned out that my dad has a minor stroke. scary can. and on my way back, thanks to bt for dropping me off at ttsh. i thought its better for me to check on them. at least i feel assured. and thank god that its a minor stroke. medicine was given and check ups are arranged.

on the way home, dad seems like a small boy. almost like a child again. i told him that its a bad sign. and that he must really cut down on his smoking habit. its not easy, yes, definitely, having smoking for the past 30 years. even longer than im living on this island. but he has to make sure he does that. ma chirped in, reminding him not to take too oily food, exercise more.

mixed feelings. on one hand, i feel good that its not a big thing, but on the other hand, i feel worrying. is that really a bad sign? as in a sign that more of such tings will come in the near future? i dare not think more. all i can do is help to look after him, constantly reminding pa not to smoke so often, take less oily food, exercise more instead of lying on the sofa watching tv and falling sleep thereafter.

the stroke came so sudden. pa was saying he was fine all day long; after sending my bro to LA, he went to work, to office, to tcs studio and then back home. fine and strong like any other days. then suddenly, his vision blurred while reading the papers and his lips numb. just like that. within seconds. its a terrible feeling, aint it? like caught you really unprepared and stuff.

pls be well and let the stroke go away, no matter how small or minor it might be. health is so important. although there are high chances of myself worrying unnecessarily, i know i will worry still from now on. especially when they're growing older with each day.

bro flew off today's dawn and poor him still flying in the air now. the ordeal will not be over when he reaches LA. he still has to take an internal flight to arizona, back at his camp to retrieve his car. most prolly staying put for the next few days before driving up to vegas and settle down to prepare for the start of his new sch term.

realize my heart cant take too many ci qi things. maybe thats why i dun dare to take those fast -riding and damn exciting roller coasters?

we will be fine and well again.

a little bit of narcissism won't hurt, and vanity isn't a sin.




涵妍。hanyan ....